SadhanaOriental Meditation and Christian Prayer
Prayer with fantasy
[29] The Awakening
I make believe that I am paralyzed from the shoulders down.
I vividly imagine my surroundings
and notice what my thoughts and feelings are.
I see the changes paralysis has brought about in
my work and my profession,
my relationships,
my self-image,
my attitude to self,
my life of prayer, my relationship with God,
my views on life.
I observe myself reacting, for example, to the daily news,
my attitudes and values regarding work,
time,
achievement,
love,
growth,
life,
progress,
death.
I contemplate an average day
from the moment of my waking in the morning
till I fall asleep at night:
my first thought on awaking,
my meals,
my toilet needs,
my work
and therapy,
my entertainment,
prayer.
At night I dedicate some minutes to thanksgiving.
I am thankful for the gift of speech:
I can express my needs
and feelings,
I can relate to others,
even help them.
And hearing:
I can hear the sound of music
and the song of birds
and human voices.
And sight:
I can look at flowers
and trees
and stars at night
and the faces of my friends.
I am full of gratitude for taste
and smell
and touch,
for thought
and memory
and fantasy
and feeling.
And now the time has come
to be grateful for paralysis itself:
I look at the blessings it has brought
till I can see it as a gift.
If I can bring myself to do this
I will have tasted
a moment of the purest mysticism,
namely, of an acceptance of everything that is.
I now reflect on something in my life
that I resent,
resist:
a physical defect,
an illness,
an unavoidable situation,
a circumstance I live in,
a happening of the past,
a person.
And step by step,
I do with it what I did with my “paralysis.”
So that, without relinquishing
my desire and my efforts
to get rid of it if possible,
I bring myself to gratitude for it,
for everything,
for every single thing.